You know how it is, right, ladies? You know a guy for a while. You hang out with him. You do fun things with him—play video games, watch movies, go hiking, go to concerts. You invite him to your parties. You listen to his problems. You do all this because you think he wants to be your friend.
But then, then comes the fateful moment where you find out that all this time, he’s only seen you as a potential girlfriend. And then if you turn him down, he may never speak to you again. This has happened to me time after time: I hit it off with a guy, and, for all that I’ve been burned in the past, I start to think that this one might actually care about me as a person. And then he asks me on a date.
I tell him how much I enjoy his company, how much I value his friendship. I tell him that I really want to be his friend and to continue hanging out with him and talking about our favorite books or exploring new restaurants or making fun of avant-garde theatre productions. But he rejects me. He doesn’t answer my calls or e-mails; if we’d been making plans to do something before this fateful incident, these plans mysteriously fail to materialize. (This is why I never did get around to seeing the Hunger Games movie. Not to name any names, but thanks a lot, Tom.) Later, when I run into him at social events, our conversations are awkward and lukewarm. This is because the moment we met, he put me in the girlfriend-zone, and now he can’t see me as friend material.
I must say that I find this really unfair. I mean, I’m a nice girl. I have a lot to offer as a friend, like not being a douchebag and stuff. But males just don’t want to be friends with nice girls like me. They can’t help it, I guess; it’s just how they’re wired, biologically. Evolution conditioned our male hominid ancestors to seek nice girls as mates and form friendship bonds only with the other dudes that they hunted mammoths with. It’s true—I know this because I studied hominids in my fifth-grade science class.
So what’s the answer? Should I take up mammoth-hunting in an attempt to appeal to the friendship centers of men’s primal lizardbrains? Should I keep making guy “friends” and then prevent them from making a move on me by subtly undermining their self-confidence? Should I just give up on those manipulative, game-playing, two-faced bastards once and for all? I don’t know. I mean, I’d really like to have a true friendship with a guy someday, but it’s so hard to trust and respect them when they never say what they mean—and you never know when you might be relegated to the girlfriend-zone.
via a friend who just visited him in prison.
Andrew is currently serving 3.5 years for revealing a security flaw by AT&T. He has been in administrative segregation for twenty days as punishment for using his payphone calls to post to Soundcloud, and for sending pre-written tweets to a friend to post to his account.
This is what administrative segregation means.
Andrew is in a 10x10 cell. He is permitted to leave for 3 15-minute showers a week.
Andrew has celiac disease- which means his intestines bleed and he is in violent pain if he eats wheat. He cannot eat most prison food. His friends were giving him money to buy food he can eat from the commissary, but he is no longer allowed access more than $20 a month of these funds. They’re being put towards his $73k fine to AT&T
Andrew was kept from speaking to his lawyer for twenty days. His lawyer’s calls, emails and faxes were unanswered.
Prison officials have threatened to place him in a CMU unit, or to shift him from prison to prison, so his loved ones on the outside will not be able to find him.
Andrew is given two envelopes and twenty stamps a month. These are his only means of communication with the outside world.
He has no access to the rest of his property.
Prison is a machine for crushing lives, where the smallest thing (a book, the sound of your friend’s voice across a crackling payphone) are snatched away as punishment for the most trivial disobedience. America imprisons more of its population than any country in the world. It’s incumbent on us not to look away.
How in the world is this treatment constitutional? It’s inhumane, and is completely out of step with his offense.
There are times when America disgusts me, and this is one of them.
The fact that he’s getting more jail time than convicted rapists sickens me.
I think I’m going through a girly phase. I apologise in advance for any photos of clothing I post.
When I was younger, my family spent a lot of time in the car together.
Since I was the baby of the family, I always had to sit in the back of the car behind the driver’s seat. No amount of shotgun calling could take the passenger seat away from my mom, and my parents argued it was unfair to make my brother, who was significantly taller than me, sit in the seat with less leg room. Even though I realise now that they were right, I guess I’m still a bit bitter about it.
We listened to the Harry Potter audio books in the car. The US version by Jim Dale, not the UK version with Stephen Fry. This was back when they were sets of cassette tapes instead of CDs or just a file on a smart phone. Every now and then we would pause them to ask a question or discuss something. It was nice.
When I ride in Tom’s car, I almost always sit in the passenger seat, and lately we’ve been listening to the World War Z audio book as we go (which I’m actually really enjoying despite not being super into zombies).
I just think it’s funny, I guess.
I’m in Tom’s room while he plays D&D.
I have a cut on my face and I don’t know how it got there.
It’s been a while since I’ve taken a webcam photo.
I made Tom a vegan hotdog. He didn’t love it, but he liked it. I tried it, and spat it out because it tasted like a hot dog to me.